Behavior Charts and Responsibility- Preparing the Little Guy for Kindergarten

I am faced with a heavy dilemma at present. The time to sign Mason up for Kindergarten is fast approaching and I am questioning is he really ready to go. He is doing exceedingly well academically. I fear however, that with the the demise of nap time, in most schools playtime and play centers that Mason will meet Kindergarten with a negative attitude resulting in a dislike of school. Moreover my greatest fear is that he will be labeled a problem child for his displays of boyishness. He still has a hard time giving up his toys in exchange for other activities. He dislikes crafts and is not all that interested in participating in class. He can sign his name but prefers writing the letters very small, very large, in scary type or just takes his time because he would rather be doing something else. Mason is very much a boy, a very active boy, in all aspects of the word. All he wants to do is play.

So do I hold Mason back for one more year of Preschool or send him on to Kindergarten. I have pretty much raised our children in a loving and playful home. We are strict about sleep. Adamant about manners and being kind to others. We teach them to help clean up when they make a mess. We have somewhat of a schedule; mostly, we learn through play Montessori style. I am an advocate of letting kids be kids. However, the time has come for Mason to learn a little responsibility. Sort of a coming of age.

After careful consideration Stephen and I have come to the conclusion that if we hold Mason back he will ultimately graduate high school at age 19. A friend of mine who is a child psychologist was helpful in the matter. She cautioned me to think about later on when he gets into 5th and 6th grades and their minds become aware of the age difference. She has seen quite a few problems lately in regards to a child’s self esteem in this particular area. After determining his age difference I went back to Susan and discussed possible solutions to prepare him for the rigors of Kindergarten.

I explained the strategies I had in mind such as introducing a behavior chart. Something we tried before but he was not quite into. Susan gave me a great idea to take pictures of Mason doing each of the activities on the behavior chart such as brushing his teeth, setting the table, behaving at school, sharing his toys and so on. When he sees himself performing all these tasks he will be more likely to participate. Another suggestion Susan had was to play more games that require him to listen to what I am saying and copy what I am doing as in Simon Says and do as I am doing. Then try seeing who can sit still the longest. Rewards can be handed out if needed. My goal is to have them sit still for 30 minutes of reading time.

I found a great idea on a blog Kirk Family Adventures. I do not know how I stumbled upon the blog but I was glad I did. We adhere somewhat to the Love and Logic philosophy. A parenting technique centered around making choices. Needless to say I was right on board with the Kirk Family’s idea of allowing their son to choose if he wanted to do the chores or have mom. If he does them then he gets a bead and if she does them them there is no reward. (A great introducing to prepare him for his first official chore and allowance beginning next year.) She made a list divided by morning, evening, any time chores and enrichment. Her son earns privileges in exchange for beads.

Another option my brother introduced to me is Handipoints. Handipoints is a free behavioral/chore chart website. It keeps track of all the child’s responsibilities and the points earned for completing them. The child can create an Avatar cat complete with user name. The parent assigns how many points and Handiland bonus points are awarded for each completed task. The parent also has to grade the tasks. So if your child gets sneaky and says they did something they did not, when you grade their chart points are deducted. Points go toward rewards you both come up with and bonus points are exchanged for clothing for their cat and decor for their house. Handiland is where the cats can chat, trade clothes or furniture with other members, play games for more bonus points and shop.

The challenge is to remember to keep Mason to task. I hung his strand of beads up where he can always see them. Out of site out of mind, right? I am encouraged and excited to see him move on and conquer great things.